Who do you depend upon for your most private and close counsel?
I realize most people know much of what I’ll discuss today, however, do we really follow the right path with our friends as we fight with our deep struggles?
The options for help are vast; a counselor or therapist, your spouse, a therapy group, a close friend, your parents friends, a good neighbor, a co-worker, your employer, your church, your children, a home group, your parents - who should you choose?
If you’re married, hopefully your spouse can provide valuable insight. Other than your spouse, who else do you rely on to be your closet confidant?
AI defines “a confidant is a close friend or associate with whom you can share private matters and secrets”. A good definition.
I’m dealing with someone struggling with something that’s very destructive to their life. Who should this person go to for therapy and counsel?
I suppose the first order of business is to ask a struggling person; “Do you desire to improve and grow?” The second priority might be to ask “Who do I want to become and what type of person do I want to be?”
This fork in the road can be critical and may change your life. It’s a great time to ask, “Do I want to become more like Christ? Or do I want to become more like someone else? If it’s someone else, who do you want to become like?
King Solomon once said “Don’t forget your friend or your parent’s friend. Don’t always go to your family for help when trouble comes. A neighbor close by is better than a family far away.” (Proverbs 27:10 NCV)
So why did King Solomon say this?
As we all know, some family members can be jealous, judgmental and some family members simply cannot get over past conflicts within the family.
Some family members may remember you as you “used to be”. They simply cannot move on. Also, as conflicts are resolved, family members might struggle and remember them longer - sometimes never getting over the bad memories.
We should pick our friends wisely. Solomon’s son took over the kingdom and refused to listen to his father’s counselors. Instead, his young and foolish friends lead him to destruction. (1 Kings, chapter 12)
We all know who we choose as a friend is critical. The question is, “Do you gravitate toward friends who make you better or ones that always agree and entertain you?”
King Solomon also said “The sweet smell of perfume and oils is pleasant, and so is good advice from a friend.” (Proverbs 27:9 NCV) Do you have a friend that draws you toward wisdom, maturity and God’s word?
The most reliable counsel is the Bible. It’s never been proven “not” to work. God’s created us. He knows us better than anyone. He wired us and fashioned us. His ways are written for our benefit. Why do so many reject his methods and counsel?
So what’s the take-away?
Have Godly friends. Choose friends that are willing to offer tough love and truth. Team up with friends who don’t judge, that are not jealous and willing to always help, pray with you and encourage you.
Wow, how great would it be to have friends like that? All we have to do, is go out and find them.
LORD, Christ calls us friends. You can lead us to the right people we should have in our life. The Holy Spirit is our friend and most reliable helper. Help me be a good friend to those in need. Help me love, encourage and never judge. We are all sinners among sinners. Only Christ is perfect. Give us a love for your ways and a deep love for our others. IJNIP amen ♥️
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