The Kind Of Friend We All Need

What percentage of the human race is struggling with something right now?

Some appear like everything is fine when it’s not. Some try to ignore what needs to be faced. Some hide their hurt behind busyness or humor. But every single one of us has something that needs support, help, and love. Everyone.

So who is actually best equipped to help? King Solomon once said something that always stops me. “Don’t forget your friend or your parent’s friend. Don’t always go to your family for help when trouble comes. A neighbor close by is better than a family far away.” (Proverbs 27:10 NCV)

I thought about this when I once considered going into full-time ministry. I met with pastor friends I really respected. Every single one of them said, “Tim, you minister so much in your business. Stay there.” And honestly, that turned out to be great advice. Our company ended up becoming a kind of ministry in the business world. People shared more, opened up more, and trusted more than I ever expected.

God knew exactly where I needed to be - and by the way, He knows where you should be too - just pray and ask Him. And ask others who know Him.

Some of the best advice I’ve ever been given came from friends. Yes, my Mom, Dad, family, and especially Wendy have given me incredible wisdom. But a friend outside the family circle sees you differently. They’re not tangled up in past memories or your old temperament when you were younger and maybe not so impressive. They don’t carry family history. They just see you, right now.

I’ve learned the best friend to call on is someone walking close to God, faithful to their spouse and family, mature, confidential, and grounded in Scripture. Why? Because nothing in God’s Word has ever failed. Not once.

“The words of the Lord are pure words, like silver tested and purified seven times.” (Psalm 12:6 NCV)

And Jesus said, “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.” (Matthew 24:35 NCV)

If God’s words never fail, then the people who live by them and share His word with you rarely give bad counsel.

Also, friends who walk with God don’t panic when you’re hurting. They don’t get swept up in emotion. They don’t rush. They pray. They stay calm. They steady you. Sometimes they even believe for you when you cannot believe for yourself.

I think the right friend will love you enough to say the hard thing gently, without shaming you. Too many people either avoid truth or hammer you with it. A Godly friend does neither. They bring truth and grace together, the way Jesus does.

I think some of the best life counsel from Jesus was His sermon on the mountain. He not only said how to live, He gave his life for the sinner - and He calls His followers friend. Jesus took every sin I’ve ever committed and paid for it with His own suffering. His pain bought my freedom. His death purchased my salvation. His resurrection made me whole as He defeated death.

And when I accepted Christ, He gave me the Holy Spirit and He placed the right people in my life to walk with me. People who pray before they speak. People who love without judging. People who help carry burdens because Christ has carried theirs.

Love wins. Forgiveness heals. Generosity strengthens. Even loving an enemy changes hearts. Jesus said, “Love your enemies. Pray for those who hurt you.” (Matthew 5:44 NCV) This is the kind of advice we need from our friends.

I love a good, honest, tough-love friend. Someone who cares deeply, listens closely, and refuses to judge quickly. A friend like that is a rare gift. “Help each other with your troubles. When you do this, you obey the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2 NCV)

And I want to be that kind of friend.

I hope I check on people even when they haven’t checked on me. I hope I pray before I give any advice. I hope I ask people how they are really doing. I hope I try to listen more and talk less. And I hope I remember how Jesus carried me, so I can carry someone else.

LORD, help me be a good friend. IJNIP amen ♥️